Swaggart. Trump. Weinstein. Epstein. Windsor. Brand. Rose… the list goes on. When will such men be spared the allegations of conniving women? It’s the one time the word “liaress,” feminine of “liar,” would be a useful addition to the language.
Everyone knows women are liaresses; it’s inherent in their DNA, a viral, vapors-prone disposition passed readily from one vixen to the next. How the contagion travels is a mystery. Where there may be, initially, one or two attention-seeking hellcats hollering rape, soon there are six, then a dozen, then twenty or more — it becomes a frenzy of follow-the-lying-liaress, a game of make-up-a-crazy-story about being violated by a powerful, charismatic man. The mendacious flibbertigibbets morph into prevaricating gerbils diving off the cliffside in their suggestible droves, infected by the vicious and delusional inventions of the original liaress. He raped me! they gibber and jabber during their richly deserved plummet to oblivion, to be dashed upon the rocks far below, where the waves consign their lying carcasses to Davy Jones’s locker.
What’s an upstanding celebrity with imperious urges to do when exposed to ripe wenches? Society can’t simply salt away its womb-stock in a secure purgatory, canopied in weeds, in order to make itself safe from female mischief. For now, the sole recourse of the harried victim is to gas off to his fanbase, lawyer up, and ride hell-bent for leather on a hobbyhorse named Consensual.
(c) 2023 JMN — EthicalDative. All rights reserved
EthicalDative 
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I hope everyone reading knows you are joking. You never know these days. I find myself saying that phrase at least twice a day, ‘these days’. Who took delivery of these substandard days?!
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OA, you have expressed the very thing that concerns me deeply, which is that readers of this post may not realize that it is pungent with irony. It’s meant to reflect the very opposite of what it says. My view is that it’s utterly implausible and indefensible that women concoct stories of violence and abuse at the hands of men, and should not believed. I’ve forgotten the crucial tenet that irony and sarcasm are best used rarely and cautiously! Thank you for your insightful comment.
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Oh what a clever piece Jim. And of course irony is likely to be misconstrued by people with little imagination. (I think Jonathan Swift’s ‘Modest Proposal’ received a horrified response when it was published). But irony is so important for pointing out the truth. Especially on this topic. Thank you for telling it! And your painting is delightful!
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Thank you, Sue. Your input is terribly bracing. I love your mention of “Modest Proposal.” I think often of it, and probably have a bit of Swift in my veins — without the genius part! Your observation about irony as a truth-telling tool is lovely.
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