Dirty dishes left in the kitchen sink have the instinct of all species, which is to propagate their kind. It takes almost superhuman discipline, but you can control this feral population through timely wash-up, limiting their opportunities to spawn. Soiled pans, flatware and cutlery are nocturnal — that’s their prime mating time — so washing dishes before bedtime is a sound habit, though for me it’s the hardest time of day to practice this grueling ritual. I’ll just wash those in the morning, when I’m fresh. No! Man up, my brothers! Confronting that mess in the morning isn’t the way to start your day — and there’ll be twice as much!
Good luck, solitary males everywhere, as you hone a skill that helps you fend for yourself in the kitchen. Remember, the man who doesn’t cook for himself eats dearly and poorly.
Tip #2 will feature two must-have tools for scooping dog poop off tile floors.
(c) 2018 JMN.